what the fuck

I gotta get out of my head.  This whole wanting sex and wanting a social life outside of married people is becoming a dark swirl of bullshit in my head.  Even the obtuse, snotty fucking 23 year old gets asked out.  Of course these people have the advantage of being straight so their dating pool is considerably larger than mine in a town that is already too small.  This does not mean I will start dating men - hairy monkeys...blech.  For fucks sake, I turn on the T.V. this morning and there are people fucking.  This is tiring.  I know that some of my best friends would say not to focus on it so much.  When you want it the worst, it never happens.  You have to stop wanting it.  Oh, fuck all that shit.  I hate it when I hear my friend's voices in my head and I know they are right.  I guess I gotta work on letting it go.  I don't want sex from a hot woman, I don't want sex from a hot woman, I don't want sex from a hot woman... Yeah, I don't believe it either.  If only I had something else to focus on...SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.  Arrrrrrrrrrrrrgh(scream of frustration).  Still don't feel better.  At least the hiking and rock climbing wear me out physically, so what do I do about my heart and my mind?  How do I make those quit wanting?  Is it even possible?  I don't want to quit wanting.  And that's that.  I have desires and I won't ignore them.  I'm waiting...